Tough onE

30th Dec
Fell down, and unable to climb up by myself. Walked in to the lecture hall to find myself failed to control the situation again. I hope I can be the angel to the evil. Storybook and music kept me focused on myself.

In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was within me an invinsible summer.

Locked upon my heart and body, I am all by myself, and that's what I love to do.

They say year 2009 is a very good year especially to 19 year old metal 'horses'. I don't feel so, the start of the year is already a bad one for me. What more to say another 365 days of year 2009?

31st Dec
0014
I was on the surface of getting into another bad dream, when an sms woke me. Thank you very much.
0032
Sweet and hopeless[full] advices kept coming from my mind and heart...Daddy, this is a message for you :

Flow with whatever is happening and let your mind be free. Stay centered by accepting whatever you are doing. This is the ultimate.
0402

When at last I was feeling tired, I closed my eyes, and the bad dream came again. Fast and scary as it was, it was so real, how I wish there's no sleeping time for me, just like for Edward Cullen.

0715

Woke up and felt it's still early, got back to sleep. blur blur blur...

0840

open...Still early...close

0906

Open, want to close not? NO, crawled out from bed and hoped to the PC. I continued on with what have I been doing before all happened cut my plans. Then, another bad beginning, she started it again.

Being a loner is good for me. Now, I'm at somewhere outta somewhere. Want to duck myself at some other place again.

When we learn to manage our emotions long enough to stop and shift our attention to the quieter message of the heart, we can gain a wider perspective on any situation, often saving ourselves from hurt, frustration and pain.

Mozart has the classic purity of light and the blue ocean; Beethoven the romantic grandeur which belongs to the storms of air and sea, and while the soul of Mozart seems to dwell on the ethereal peaks of Olympus, that of Beethoven climbs shuddering the storm-beaten sides of a Sinai. Blessed be they both! Each represents a moment of the ideal life, each does us good. Our love is due to both.

Let us invite year 2009 with joy. Clap Clap!!